This article is for all the amazing family and friends that surround us homeschoolers. You are important to us and a blessing to our life!
If you’re reading this blog post, it has been forwarded with much love and gratitude by someone who values you and wants your support very much.
God created humans for connection and relationships. We can see that right from the beginning in the garden of Eden.
Homeschoolers value the positive connections and fellowship from friends and family because it is the road less traveled and requires leveling up in parenting, home duties, and taking on the vital task of educating children.
Let’s dive into the 4 Dos and 3 Don’ts for family and friends of homeschooling families!
The Dos
#1 Do get educated.
If you think you disagree with homeschooling in the first place, then this one is for you.
A lack of reliable information on homeschooling outcomes is common, even from folks who are educators.
Sometimes there is an elitist mentality among educators, which becomes a blind spot, making it challenging to see home education for what it truly is.
If you care about the person who sent you this article, then I hope you will care enough to get educated on homeschooling if you can’t offer them unconditional support in their choice.
Did you know homeschool students score higher than public school students according to nearly all research done on the subject?
This blog post has great information on the topic.
Homeschool vs Public School Test Scores and Statistics – 2008 to 2014. (howdoihomeschool.com)
My blog post, The three main reasons why homeschool parents are criticized will likely cover most of your concerns.
I also wrote, An open letter to Christian parents of children in public school, where I outline the current crisis in our educational system due to our changing culture.
If you are not aware of what is happening in public schools, you should find out and reevaluate your support of this institution.
Christian homeschool parents are dedicated to raising their children to glorify God and honor him in the educational process, which they have every right to do.
It is a huge responsibility and not one taken on lightly. This is why we all need support from those we love!
At the end of the day, we all get to raise our kids the way we want. We don’t have the right or responsibility to raise anyone else’s.
#2 Do offer encouragement
I Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Encouraging others is a biblical precept that we should all be following because we all need encouragement.
Show empathy, actively listen, engage in dialogue, offer solutions, and give the benefit of the doubt to your loved ones homeschooling because it can be hard. You can be the soft place they land.
Encouragement is about the heart, connecting, and showing love.
Ever wanted to be a cheerleader? Now is your time! Your kind words can be very powerful and soothe doubt, discouragement, fear, and worry.
Galatians 6:2
Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
#3 Do offer support
Homeschool parents are stretched very thin. Little things can make a big difference in the homeschool day:
- Send a card to mom and tell her she’s awsome.
- Send a card to the kids and tell them they’re awesome.
- Offer to help with a messy project, watch the kids for an hour so mom can get a break, or take the kids on a field trip for the day.
- Attend the kids’ co-op play, music performance, science presentation, or any special event.
- Be the interviewee for a report.
Philippians 2:4 “Do not be concerned about your own interests, but also be concerned about the interests of others. “
Generally, be engaged in the homeschool adventure. It’s lots of fun!
#4 Do PRAY
Colossians 1:9
For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,
James 5:16
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
Romans 8:26
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.
The Holy Spirit is with us in prayer, interceding for us when the words don’t come. Homeschool parents need to be filled with the knowledge of God’s will for them in the path they have chosen. They need wisdom and understanding as they guide their children.
We are instructed to pray for each other without ceasing, which is the best gift and blessing a homeschool family can have!
Will you partner with us as we raise the next generation in the Lord?
The Don'ts
Whether these things are done with the best of intentions or because homeschooling is viewed negatively, please consider the implications and affect they have on the ones you love.
#1 Don’t question the choices of parents
Challenging the decisions loving, God-fearing parents make is bound to stress relationships. It sends the message, “You don’t know what you’re doing with your own children. I know better.”
Ever heard the expression, “It went over like a lead balloon”? That was coined from the example above. (Just kidding.)
Asking questions to learn and understand or be educated is just fine. Statements that criticize homeschooling and are primarily anecdotal are not.
“You don’t know my friend’s niece and how weird she is and how far behind in school she is.”
Neither do you. She may have learning challenges, mental health issues, and personal problems you know nothing about. Even if that is true and accurate, it is not an argument for anyone else to abandon homeschooling.
Do you want to hear about all the “weird” kids I went to public school with and the ones that barely graduated? That would take the rest of this blog post to cover, so let’s move on.
#2 Don’t quiz the kids
Asking children to answer multiplication facts or history and science questions sends the message homeschool isn’t to be trusted as valid, and should be challenged to determine if the evidence collected from the children is admissible in the court of life.
Exams like this don’t make anyone feel good; the children who bear the brunt of the pop quiz, the parents who are annoyed they are being challenged through their kids, and I bet even the proctor of this assessment may end up feeling bad for setting the children up like this.
I don’t think this is a wise thing to do to a public school child either.
Not only is it a challenge to the homeschooling choice, but it sends the message that the only thing that matters is regurgitating memorized facts? Learning is so much more than that.
Please, stop quizzing the kids on 6 x 7.
It’s 42.
#3 Don’t offer to pay for private school.
Unless you know that the parents wanted private school all along and suddenly you can cover the costs, please don’t do this.
It really has a way of confusing well-intentioned parents because there is such a hefty price tag (which appears to give it great value).
It preys on the doubts society has already instilled in so many folks who worry that they may make a mistake in educating their child. (News flash- mistakes will be made. They are also made in public school, and we all survived.)
Large sums of money and avoiding responsibility have a way of blocking our ears from hearing the calling of God and leading us into disobedience.
If Private school were the first choice, you would already know it; your offer is then generous and without fault.
I pray these “Do’s and Don’ts” are eye-opening to everyone who has children they love in their lives.
We need you and want your support. Whether you are grandma, grandpa, aunt, uncle, niece, neighbor, or friend, your support, encouragement, prayers, and positive input is part of the homeschooling victory.
One day we will all celebrate our children moving into adulthood as well-adjust, educated, and faithful servants of our Lord Jesus Christ!
Leave a comment or question about homeschooling below, and God bless!